The song begins with a self-reflective question, “Hey, Nate, how’s life?” to which the artist, NF, gives a hesitant “I don’t know, it’s alright.” He immediately delves into his recent struggles, admitting to sleepless nights and dealing with universal human issues. This prefaces a deeper confession about a mental breakdown he experienced the previous year, where his thoughts became overwhelmingly negative, leading him to seek therapy. He describes a feeling of unease in his own mind, metaphorically referring to it as his “house,” and considers making a drastic change, like moving out and starting fresh. This involves metaphorically cleaning his yard and removing a noose, symbolizing a desire to rid himself of suicidal thoughts and air out his heavy heart.
He then frames his current state as a “search,” a process of learning and keeping what’s valuable while trying to leave his burdens behind, though he admits he’s not entirely successful. The journey is fraught with anxiety and uncertainty, as he often loses sight of his path, and life becomes a blur. Despite the potential for pain, he believes the search is worthwhile. He acknowledges the harsh realities of the world and his return to a state of exploration, looking for an “antidote” to decipher life’s complexities. He’s in a classic, focused mode, not seeking pity but also not tolerating disrespect. The song then experiences a beat switch, and NF’s tone shifts to be more assertive and confident.
He details the internal conflict he faces, especially with the pressures of fame. Performing in front of large crowds triggers his anxiety, and he describes the experience of putting on a metaphorical “makeup” or a facade, which can lead to self-hatred and losing his train of thought. He expresses a disinterest in fame, having had a taste of it and finding it unfulfilling. His focus is on his craft and staying true to himself, even if it means going against the grain of the music industry. He criticizes the superficiality he observes and the pressure to create radio-friendly hits. He asserts his authenticity and dedication to his music, which he views as a documentation of his life.
NF then addresses his detractors, acknowledging that his music might not be for everyone but demanding that he should never be considered forgettable. He aims to leave a lasting impression and provokes deep thought. He suggests that some people dislike his music because it forces them to confront raw emotions they might be afraid of. The lyrics then take on a more instructional tone, as he advises listeners to be wary of negativity that can erode their faith. He describes his meticulous and obsessive work ethic, highlighting his dedication and the control he maintains over his creative process. The song concludes with an invitation to his fans to join him on this “search.” He encourages them to embrace their own burdens, symbolized by balloons, and to embark on this journey with him, emphasizing that it will be a "wild ride.”
Song Discussion - The Search by NF
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