Sleeping

At its core, Sleeping is a profound exploration of how devastating grief collides with the expectations and realities of the outside world. Inspired by the tragic loss of her older sister, Celene, Gigi Perez uses the song to dissect the resentment and isolation that often accompany profound mourning. The song explicitly contrasts the performative, socially acceptable mourning of the public—those who 'cry 'cause that's what they do'—with the suffocating, messy, and isolating reality of true grief, where the narrator is left 'locked in your room' as months turn into years.

Implicitly, the song speaks to the phenomenon of emotional dissociation as a trauma response. When Perez sings about slipping into a 'pretty, black mess' and 'sleeping' or 'snoring' through life, she is illustrating a state of profound numbness. This 'sleep' is a metaphor for sleepwalking through existence, detached from reality because the pain of waking up to a world without her loved one is simply too much to bear. It also touches upon the self-destructive tendencies born from desperation, referenced in lines about selling her soul and making choices that left her hollow.

Furthermore, the song serves as a scathing indictment of conditional relationships and abandonment. The recurring bridge, where she lists the places someone failed to meet her—most notably 'at her grave'—transforms the song from a purely internal monologue about depression into a directed expression of anger. It highlights the agonizing realization that people are often eager to share in your joy but disappear when confronted with the heavy, uncomfortable reality of your grief. In this way, Sleeping captures the messy, non-linear, and deeply uncomfortable truths of outliving a loved one.

The narrative of the song delves deep into the visceral and isolating experience of mourning, portraying a stark contrast between the performative sympathy of outsiders and the debilitating reality of personal loss. It begins by observing how people outwardly react to death—crying simply because societal norms dictate that it is the appropriate response. Meanwhile, the narrator is trapped in a profound state of paralysis, locked away in her room as time distorts, watching months blur into years. This paralyzing grief breeds a sense of profound misunderstanding, as those on the outside are entirely incapable of comprehending the depths of her fears and internal agony.

Seeking an escape or perhaps surrendering to the overwhelming weight of her emotions, the narrator describes descending into a 'pretty, black mess.' This metaphor captures the seductive, consuming nature of depression and grief. In this state of numbed detachment, she admits to making self-destructive choices—metaphorically selling her soul and her songs for far less than their worth, acting out of desperation while essentially 'sleeping' or sleepwalking through her own life. She is physically present but emotionally comatose, metaphorically snoring through the reality she cannot bear to face.

As the story progresses, the narrator highlights the conditional nature of the support she receives. People are eager to cheer and celebrate alongside her during moments of success, yet when push comes to shove and the true darkness of her grief emerges, that support vanishes, leaving her entirely devoid of love or comfort. This abandonment breeds a deep-seated resentment, culminating in a series of direct accusations directed at a specific individual—presumably a former partner or close confidant. She repeatedly lists the ways this person failed to show up for her in her most vulnerable moments: they didn't meet her at the park, in the rain, at the car, or most devastatingly, at her sister's grave. Instead of offering a safe haven, this person only drove her further into insanity. The repetition of these failures underscores the lingering trauma of being abandoned in the darkest chapter of her life, forever associating her period of 'sleeping' through grief with the bitter sting of isolation and betrayal.

Sleeping is the second track on Gigi Perez's highly anticipated debut album, At The Beach, In Every Life, released on April 25, 2025, via Island Records. The album as a whole is a deeply personal, self-produced project that centers on themes of faith, love, and the profound grief stemming from the passing of Perez's older sister, Celene. Gigi Perez served as the primary songwriter and executive producer for the project, working closely with collaborators Noah Weinman and Aidan Hobbs.

In an intimate Song Stories interview released in September 2025, Gigi revealed that she wrote Sleeping a little over a year prior to the album's release. She explained that the song was born out of a period of deep reflection on 'how my grief met the real world.' Dealing with the profound loss of Celene, Perez admitted she was tapping into the 'resentment aspects of my grief'. She felt a jarring juxtaposition between the isolating agony of her immediate mourning period and her life years later as she began to find her footing again.

The song was crafted during a time when Perez felt intensely isolated, feeling that societal expectations of 'graceful' mourning completely opposed her messy internal reality. By pouring this resentment and emotional paralysis into Sleeping, she created a brutally honest track that not only honored her authentic experience but ultimately helped her connect with a broader community of listeners who had similarly felt abandoned or misunderstood in their own grief.

Sleeping features a somewhat fluid rhyme scheme that mirrors the unpredictable and disorienting nature of grief. In the verses, Perez relies heavily on couplets and perfect rhymes (e.g., years / fears and mess / less). This structured rhyming creates a deceptive sense of normalcy that is continuously undercut by the heavy, sorrowful lyrical content.

Rhythmically, the song maintains a deliberate, almost sluggish tempo that embodies the sensation of trudging through depression. The meter is conversational, allowing Perez to deliver the lines with a raw, spoken-word intimacy before ascending into more melodic, belting phrases. The pacing of the track is incredibly intentional; the slow build of the verses gives way to a more intense, emotionally charged rhythm in the bridge. As she lists the places her companion failed to meet her, the cadence quickens, reflecting a rising tide of anger and panic breaking through the previously established emotional numbness. This interplay between the lethargic musical rhythm and the increasingly frantic lyrical pacing perfectly encapsulates the song's core theme of waking up to the painful reality of abandonment.

Musically, Sleeping leans into Gigi Perez's signature indie-folk and alternative pop sound, utilizing a stripped-back arrangement that emphasizes the raw vulnerability of her alto vocals. The song builds with haunting, hypnotic crescendos that sonically mimic the overwhelming, rolling waves of grief. The production, largely handled by Perez herself along with Noah Weinman, allows the devastating lyrics to remain at the absolute forefront, devoid of distracting electronic over-production.

Literarily, Perez employs sharp irony and juxtaposition to convey her resentment. She juxtaposes the performative, socially acceptable grief of others ('They cry 'cause that's what they do / That's just the right thing to do') with her own visceral, debilitating paralysis ('But you stay locked in your room'). This clearly highlights the disconnect between societal expectations and the messy reality of trauma.

The song also makes powerful use of anaphora (the repetition of a word or phrase at the beginning of successive clauses) during the bridge: 'You didn't meet me at the park / You didn't meet me in the rain...' This relentless repetition feels like a litany of betrayals, driving home the suffocating feeling of being consistently abandoned. The delivery of these lines, coupled with haunting background vocal harmonies (the recurring 'La-la's), creates an eerie, lullaby-like dissonance that perfectly matches the theme of a nightmarish, sleepwalking state.

Released as the second track on her highly acclaimed 2025 debut album At The Beach, In Every Life, Sleeping quickly resonated with fans and critics alike for its unflinching portrayal of grief. Following the massive, viral success of her breakout single 'Sailor Song', Perez had a large audience eagerly awaiting her deeper, more introspective work. Critics praised the album's emotional depth, explicitly highlighting Sleeping as a pivotal track that showcases Perez's ability to tackle uncomfortable truths and 'evoke a flood of memory and melancholy'.

Culturally, the song found a significant audience on social media platforms, where listeners connected deeply with its themes of isolation and the frustrating reality of 'performative sympathy' from outsiders. It has sparked widespread conversations among fans about the non-linear, often ugly realities of losing a loved one. By openly addressing the resentment and emotional dissociation that accompany profound loss, Gigi Perez's Sleeping has become an anthem for those navigating the darkest, most isolated corners of their own grief, further cementing her reputation as a powerful, empathetic voice in the modern indie-folk landscape.

The lyrics of Sleeping are rich with metaphors that vividly illustrate the paralyzing nature of grief. The most prominent metaphor is the concept of 'sleeping' itself. In the song, sleeping and 'snoring' do not represent restful slumber, but rather an emotional coma. It symbolizes dissociation—a psychological defense mechanism where the narrator checks out of reality to survive the crushing weight of her loss.

Another central piece of imagery is the 'pretty, black mess'. This oxymoron captures the seductive pull of depression. The darkness is a 'mess' because it destroys her life and relationships, but it is 'pretty' because it offers a comforting, numb refuge away from the painful demands of the outside world. Sinking into this mess is portrayed as an act of desperate self-preservation, even as it leads to self-destructive behaviors like 'selling her soul' or her songs.

The contrast between the 'room' and the 'park/grave/rain' serves as spatial symbolism. The locked room represents the inescapable internal prison of her grief. In contrast, the external locations (the park, the car, the rain, the grave) represent the physical world where life continues and where interpersonal connections are supposed to happen. The repeated failure of someone to meet her in these external spaces underscores the complete breakdown of her support system, highlighting the unbridgeable gap between her internal agony and the external world.

The most devastating recurring motif in the song is the accusatory phrase, 'You didn't meet me...' repeated throughout the bridge. By listing specific locations—the park, the rain, the car, and finally, 'at her grave'—Perez transforms an abstract feeling of abandonment into a tangible, deeply personal betrayal. The repetition of this phrase acts as a hammering emotional hook, emphasizing that this wasn't a one-time failure, but a consistent pattern of absence when she needed support the most.

Another significant recurring phrase is 'I was sleeping, I was snoring.' This line serves as the anchor for the choruses, reminding the listener of the narrator's dissociated state. By repeating this phrase, Perez reinforces the idea that her destructive actions and emotional distance were not choices made with a clear mind, but the desperate survival tactics of someone entirely consumed by the 'pretty, black mess' of trauma.

Additionally, the juxtaposition of 'They cry 'cause that's what they do' and 'They cheer 'cause that's what they do' acts as a thematic bookend. It highlights the fickle, superficial nature of public perception, showing how outsiders blindly follow social scripts—whether in mourning or celebration—while the narrator suffers entirely alone in the background.