help_urself

"help_urself" by Ezekiel is a raw and unfiltered exploration of deep internal turmoil, self-destruction, and despair. The song delves into the psyche of someone caught in a vicious cycle of negative behavior, likely involving substance abuse, as suggested by the line 'Gone broke again off the dro'. The central theme is a profound conflict between the desire for connection and the overwhelming weight of self-loathing and personal failures. The opening line, 'I hate you though / We gon' make this work through,' immediately establishes this contradictory state of mind, reflecting a toxic relationship, possibly with another person or with the self.

The lyrics convey a powerful sense of being trapped and suffocated, both by external circumstances and internal demons. The metaphor of being in 'a broke life in a cell' vividly illustrates this feeling of imprisonment and hopelessness. The song's narrative voice expresses exhaustion from being mistreated ('Gettin' tired of bein' had') and from their own persistent sadness, which affects those around them. This creates a portrait of someone who feels like a burden, further deepening their isolation. The overarching message is a bleak one, culminating in the paradoxical advice to 'Stay in, don't help yourself.' This closing line suggests a state of complete resignation, an acceptance of one's dire situation, and the perceived futility of seeking help or trying to change. It's a stark commentary on the paralyzing nature of severe depression and the struggle against one's own destructive impulses.

The song's narrative voice is caught in a turbulent and contradictory emotional state. It begins with a stark declaration of hatred, immediately followed by a resolve to make a troubled relationship work. This internal conflict is the driving force of the lyrical journey. The protagonist is trapped in a self-destructive cycle, indicated by going broke from substance use ('dro') and the physical manifestation of stress through headaches upon returning home. There's a sense of escapism, a desire to disappear when things get too real, as expressed in the line, 'When the Sun's out, I'm gone.' This suggests an inability to face problems in the light of day.

A heavy weight of past mistakes and the feeling of being wronged permeates the lyrics. The narrator is 'Gettin' tired of bein' had,' but also recognizes that others are weary of their persistent sadness. This creates a feeling of isolation and being a burden. The imagery becomes increasingly dark and desperate, with the metaphor 'Bottom of the lake in a bag' painting a grim picture of feeling trapped, suffocated, and wishing to vanish completely. This isn't just a fleeting low; it's a profound sense of hopelessness.

As the song progresses, a morbid sense of acceptance sets in. The narrator feels their time is coming to an end, comparing their internal state to physical decay: 'Under skin and the flesh decay.' There's a chilling resignation in the thought that it's time for someone else to take their place, as if their life is a role they are ready to abdicate. Amid this despair, there is a moment of painful self-realization ('In this time I met myself'), but this epiphany doesn't lead to hope. Instead, it solidifies the feeling of being imprisoned in a broken existence, described as 'a broke life in a cell.' The final, repeated line, 'Stay in, don't help yourself,' acts as a bleak mantra. It can be interpreted as a command from the depths of depression, an acceptance of paralysis, and the ultimate futility of trying to break free from the cycle of self-destruction.

Ezekiel, a young artist from Manchester, U.K., is the sole writer, producer, and performer behind "help_urself". The song was created entirely in his bedroom, highlighting his status as a true DIY artist. At the time of the song's rise in popularity, Ezekiel was also attending fashion school, balancing his creative pursuits. He began producing music at the age of 11, viewing it as a logical next step after learning video editing and Photoshop. His musical style is a fusion of various genres that have inspired him, including EDM, drum & bass, and 2000s pop. "help_urself" was officially released on June 11, 2021. The track gained massive traction on the social media platform TikTok, where it was used in videos by major creators like Bella Poarch, leading to hundreds of millions of global streams and propelling Ezekiel to internet fame.

The rhythmic structure of "help_urself" is a driving force behind its frantic and anxious energy. The song is set at a fast tempo, approximately 165 BPM, utilizing complex and rapid-fire drum patterns characteristic of drum & bass and jungle music. This creates a relentless, forward-moving pulse that mirrors the lyrical themes of a chaotic, spiraling mental state. The interplay between the frenetic beat and the more sustained, distorted bass and synth lines creates a sense of tension and unease.

Lyrically, the song doesn't adhere to a strict, traditional rhyme scheme, leaning more towards a free verse structure. However, it employs occasional end rhymes (e.g., 'dro' / 'home', 'had' / 'sad', 'day' / 'way' / 'decay' / 'place') to provide a sense of cohesion and lyrical flow amidst the musical chaos. The phrasing of the lyrics is often short and punchy, delivered in a way that feels raw and conversational, enhancing the song's confessional quality. The rhythm of the vocal delivery is often syncopated against the driving beat, adding another layer of complexity and reflecting the internal disarray of the narrator.

Musically, "help_urself" is a prime example of the hyperpop and glitchcore genres, blending elements from various styles. Ezekiel, as the producer, employs techniques that create a chaotic yet compelling soundscape. The song is characterized by its high tempo (around 165 BPM), brash synth melodies, and heavily distorted basslines. There's a notable use of excessive compression and distortion, which are hallmarks of the hyperpop genre. The track incorporates fast-paced drum patterns reminiscent of jungle and drum & bass. Ezekiel's vocal delivery is raw and emotionally charged, often verging on a post-hardcore or punk style, which contrasts with the electronic production. This fusion of genres—combining the energy of EDM and breakbeats with the confessional, angst-ridden nature of punk and emo—is a key stylistic choice that enhances the song's themes of internal conflict and turmoil. The DIY production, done entirely in his bedroom, lends an unfiltered and authentic quality to the track.

The primary cultural impact of "help_urself" stems from its viral success on TikTok. The song became a massive trend on the platform, utilized by some of its biggest creators, including Bella Poarch, which exposed it to a global audience. This online popularity translated into huge streaming numbers, accumulating over 500 million global streams and establishing Ezekiel as a prominent emerging artist in the hyperpop scene. Dummy Mag hailed him as one of the “Best Emerging UK Hyperpop Artists,” largely due to the song's success. The track's fusion of genres and its raw, emotional content resonated with an online audience and helped solidify the sound of the glitchcore and drum & bass-influenced hyperpop subgenres. Following its popularity, several alternate versions were released, including slowed, breakcore, and boosted versions, as well as a remix titled "help_urself 2" featuring artist Siiickbrain, further cementing its place in the internet music culture of the early 2020s.

The lyrics of "help_urself" are rich with dark symbolism and metaphors that illustrate the narrator's mental state.

• 'Bottom of the lake in a bag': This is the most potent and chilling metaphor in the song. It powerfully evokes feelings of being trapped, suffocated, and a desire to disappear completely. It symbolizes a total loss of hope and can be interpreted as hinting at suicidal ideation.
• 'A broke life in a cell': This phrase compares the narrator's existence to that of a prisoner. The 'cell' is not necessarily a physical one, but a psychological prison built from despair, self-destructive habits, and emotional pain. It signifies a life that is confined, broken, and devoid of freedom.
• 'When the sun's out I'm gone': This line symbolizes an avoidance of clarity and reality. The sun often represents truth, hope, and the start of a new day. The narrator's disappearance during this time suggests an escape into shadows and an inability to face their problems head-on.
• 'Under skin and the flesh decay': This visceral imagery is a metaphor for the internal deterioration the narrator feels. It's a physical manifestation of their psychological pain and the toll that their lifestyle and mental state are taking on them, suggesting a feeling of rotting from the inside out.

The most significant recurring phrase in "help_urself" is the final line, 'Stay in, don't help yourself.' This phrase acts as the song's dark thesis statement. Its repetition at the end solidifies the theme of resignation and the feeling of being utterly trapped in a cycle of self-destruction. It's a paradoxical and haunting piece of advice that encapsulates the core message of hopelessness and the internal voice of depression that discourages any attempt at recovery.

The opening line, 'I hate you though,' also serves as a crucial motif. It sets the stage for the song's central conflict. While it only appears once at the beginning, its impact lingers throughout the track, framing the subsequent lyrics about trying to make things work through a lens of resentment and internal struggle. Thematically, the motifs of substance abuse ('dro'), physical pain ('headaches'), and decay ('flesh decay') recur, painting a consistent picture of a life unraveling due to self-destructive behaviors and overwhelming despair.