Mean It

"Mean It" delves into the emotional turmoil of a one-sided relationship characterized by ambiguity and mixed signals. The song is a heartfelt plea for clarity and honesty from a partner who seems hesitant and emotionally unavailable. The narrators, Lauv and LANY's Paul Klein, express their frustration with a romantic interest who is affectionate and vulnerable one moment, only to become cold and distant the next. This inconsistency leads to a feeling of being emotionally manipulated, or "played with." The core message is an ultimatum: the relationship cannot continue unless the partner is genuinely committed. The lyrics, "Don't build me up just to let me down," encapsulate the pain of false hope and the desire to protect oneself from further heartbreak. The song also touches on the theme of being a second choice or a rebound, as suggested by the line, "you only let me hold you when he can't," which adds a layer of insecurity and desperation to the narrative. Ultimately, "Mean It" is a song about demanding respect and sincerity in a relationship, choosing self-preservation over the pain of unreciprocated love.

The narrative unfolds from the perspective of someone deeply invested in a budding romance, yet plagued by uncertainty and mixed signals from their partner. The song begins with an observation of the partner's inconsistent behavior. One moment they are close and intimate, like the previous night which felt more than fine, and the next, there's a palpable distance and a lack of clear communication. This inconsistency leaves the narrator feeling impatient and unable to read their partner's true feelings, creating a sense of unease. They are fully committed, describing themselves as "all in" and falling faster, but this vulnerability is met with what feels like a "heart of doubt" from the other person.

The central plea of the song is established in the chorus, a direct and desperate request for honesty and genuine intention. The narrator implores their partner not to offer physical affection, like a kiss, or declare a need for them unless they truly 'mean it'. They articulate the pain of being emotionally toyed with, using the metaphor of being built up only to be let down. This refrain highlights a fear of being used as an emotional placeholder and a strong desire to avoid the inevitable heartbreak that comes from false hope. It's a protective measure, an attempt to build walls to shield themselves from further pain.

The second verse, delivered by LANY's Paul Klein, adds another layer to the story, suggesting a reason for the partner's hesitation. It becomes clear that the narrator might be the second choice or a rebound. The lyrics state, "you only let me hold you when he can't," which paints a vivid picture of a love triangle where the narrator is only given attention when the primary partner is unavailable. This revelation amplifies the feeling of being used and deepens the narrator's confusion and frustration. They are caught in the palm of their partner's hand, loving the affection but painfully aware of its conditional nature.

The song culminates in a repetition of the core message, a powerful ultimatum against emotional manipulation. The act of saying they're "just friends" after moments of intimacy is called out as a confusing and hurtful contradiction. The recurring demand—"don't kiss me," "don't tell me that you need me," "don't show up at my house"—serves as a final, firm boundary. It's a declaration that they would rather have nothing at all than a love that isn't real, sincere, and fully committed. The song captures the quintessential modern dating dilemma of navigating ambiguous relationships and the courage it takes to demand emotional honesty.

"Mean It" is a collaboration between American singer-songwriter Lauv (Ari Leff) and the American indie pop band LANY. It was released on November 14, 2019, as the seventh single from Lauv's debut studio album, ~how i'm feeling~ (2020). The collaboration had been anticipated for a long time by fans of both artists, who share similar musical and thematic sensibilities. Lauv and LANY's lead singer, Paul Klein, had been discussing working together for a while before the song came to fruition. Lauv initiated the idea for the track, starting it from the perspective of what he imagined someone might want to say to him, acknowledging his own imperfections in relationships. He texted the initial concept to Klein, and it "just clicked." They then got into the studio to finish the record, a process Lauv described as a "grand ol' time." Lauv, a long-time fan of LANY, felt the final product was a "perfect blend" of their two distinct sounds. The track was written by Ari Leff, Paul Klein, Michael Matosic, and Michael Pollack, with production handled by LANY, Mike Crossey, and Lauv himself.

The lyrics of "Mean It" employ several metaphors to illustrate the emotional state of the narrator and the precarious nature of the relationship.

• Building Up and Letting Down: The recurring phrase "Don't build me up just to let me down" is a central metaphor for the emotional rollercoaster the narrator is experiencing. It symbolizes the creation of hope and expectations (building up) that are subsequently shattered by the partner's inconsistency, leading to disappointment (letting down).
• Falling with Feet on the Ledge: The line "Don't tell me you're falling with your feet still on the ledge" is a powerful image representing a lack of full commitment. Falling in love requires a leap of faith, but having one's feet on the ledge suggests a hesitation and an unwillingness to fully dive in, keeping a safe way out. It perfectly captures the partner's emotional guardedness.
• Treasure Hunt in the Desert: The music video adds a layer of symbolism, depicting Lauv and Paul Klein on a treasure hunt in a psychedelic desert landscape. This journey can be seen as a metaphor for their attempt to find something real and genuine (the treasure) within a confusing and illusory (psychedelic) relationship, trying to make sense of what's real and what's fake.

The emotional atmosphere of "Mean It" is a complex blend of longing, frustration, and vulnerability. The song captures the anxiety of being in a state of romantic limbo. While the melody and production are smooth, breezy, and calming, the lyrics convey a deep-seated frustration with a partner's indecisiveness. This creates a bittersweet and melancholic tone; it's a catchy pop song on the surface, but underneath lies a relatable story of potential heartbreak. There's a palpable sense of defensiveness as the narrator sets up emotional walls ("Don't kiss me... if you don't mean it") to protect themselves. This act of self-preservation is born from the pain of feeling like a second choice and the fear of being led on. The overall mood is one of desperate pleading, a final attempt to salvage a connection by demanding the one thing that seems to be missing: genuine, unwavering commitment. The song perfectly captures the uneasy feeling of loving someone whose intentions you can't quite trust.

"Mean It" was released as a highly anticipated collaboration between two artists known for their emotionally resonant indie-pop music, and it successfully merged their fanbases. The song was featured as the seventh single from Lauv's successful debut album, ~how i'm feeling~, which debuted at number 16 on the US Billboard 200. While not Lauv's biggest chart-topper, "Mean It" performed well internationally, charting in several countries including Australia (42), Singapore (2), the UK (83), and bubbling under the US Hot 100. Its most significant impact was in Southeast Asia, where both Lauv and LANY have substantial followings, reaching number 3 in Malaysia. The music video, released in December 2019, features Lauv and LANY's Paul Klein in a desert, further cementing the collaboration's visual identity. The song is often highlighted as a standout track on the album for its relatable critique of modern dating and its seamless fusion of the two artists' styles. As part of the ~how i'm feeling~ era, it contributed to Lauv's image as a leading voice in pop music for lyrical honesty and vulnerability.

The rhyme scheme in "Mean It" is relatively straightforward, primarily using couplets and simple end rhymes to maintain a pop-friendly structure and lyrical flow. For instance, in the first verse, "impatient" rhymes with "conversation" (as a slant rhyme) and "thinking" is repeated. The pre-chorus uses a clear AABB pattern with "in"/"in" and "faster"/"doubt". The chorus relies heavily on the repetition of the key phrase "mean it" and the rhyming of "round" and "down". This simplicity makes the lyrics direct and easy to follow, reinforcing the song's theme of seeking clarity. The rhythm is built around a mid-tempo, synth-driven beat that gives the song its characteristic laid-back, yet danceable feel. This creates an interesting contrast with the lyrical content, which expresses anxiety and frustration. The relaxed, almost breezy rhythm juxtaposes the emotional tension, a common technique in modern pop to make serious themes more accessible and sonically pleasing. The vocal delivery follows the relaxed rhythm, gliding smoothly over the electronic production.

"Mean It" showcases a seamless blend of Lauv's and LANY's signature indie-pop and electropop styles. Musically, the song is built on a foundation of pulsating synths, which provide a rhythmic and dreamy touch, characteristic of LANY's production. The arrangement is generally relaxed and laid-back, creating a smooth, melodic, and catchy tune that is also danceable. Vocally, Lauv's soft, soothing voice handles the first verse, with Paul Klein's similar timbre taking over the second. Their voices blend so seamlessly that some listeners find it hard to distinguish between them, a testament to how well their styles complement each other. Lyrically, the song employs a direct, conversational, and honest narrative style, a hallmark of Lauv's songwriting. It avoids complex metaphors in favor of straightforward, emotionally transparent lyrics that articulate a common relational struggle. The use of rhetorical questions like "Please, tell me what you're thinking" emphasizes the narrator's desperation for clarity. The structure relies on the repetition of the chorus as a powerful, anthemic plea, making the song's central message memorable.

What is the meaning of the song 'Mean It' by Lauv and LANY?

'Mean It' is about the frustration of being in a one-sided relationship with someone who sends mixed signals. The singer asks their partner for clarity, telling them not to show affection or make promises unless they are genuinely committed and 'mean it'.

Who is 'Mean It' by Lauv written about?

Lauv has stated that he started writing the song from the perspective of what he imagined someone might want to say to him, admitting his own flaws in relationships. It's not about a specific person but rather a relatable feeling of romantic uncertainty.

When was 'Lauv - Mean It' released?

'Mean It' was released on November 14, 2019. It was the seventh single from Lauv's debut studio album, '~how i'm feeling~', which came out in 2020.

What do the lyrics 'you only let me hold you when he can't' mean?

This line strongly implies that the narrator is a second choice or a rebound in a love triangle. The person they are involved with only seeks their affection and intimacy when their primary partner is unavailable, highlighting the conditional nature of the relationship.

What musical genre is 'Mean It'?

'Mean It' is primarily categorized as pop, specifically blending elements of electropop, indie pop, and synth-pop, reflecting the signature sounds of both Lauv and LANY.

How did the collaboration between Lauv and LANY for 'Mean It' happen?

Lauv and LANY's Paul Klein had been mutual fans and had talked about collaborating for a long time. Lauv sent Klein the initial idea for the song via text, they both felt it 'clicked,' and they finished writing and recording it together in the studio.